Pause, Reflect and Reset: Small Changes That Can Improve Your Mental Wellbeing🌹
Updated: 4 days ago
Before you react, pause. Before you take offence, consider another point of view. Before you reject criticism, ask yourself whether there might be something in it that could actually help you.
One of the most powerful things we can learn in self development is that we do not have to react to every thought, comment or criticism the moment we hear it. We can stop, breathe and look at the situation from outside our own immediate emotions.
That pause can change everything.
When somebody says something we do not want to hear, our first response can be defensive. We may feel judged, criticised or attacked. But instead of immediately thinking, “Why are they having a go at me?”, try asking yourself:
“Are they actually trying to hurt me, or could they be trying to help me?”
That question is particularly important when the person speaking is someone close to us.
Someone who genuinely cares about us may sometimes say things that are uncomfortable to hear. They may notice something that we cannot see because we are too close to it ourselves. Their intention may not be to put us down. It may be to help us recognise something that is affecting our wellbeing.
For example, imagine somebody close to you says, “You really need to clean up your home. There is so much clutter here.”
It would be easy to take offence. You might immediately think, “Who are they to tell me how to live?”
But pause.
Look at the situation from their point of view.
Could they be saying this because they have noticed that your surroundings are affecting you? Could they have seen you becoming overwhelmed, frustrated or unhappy? Could their comment actually be coming from concern rather than criticism?
That does not mean every criticism is justified, and we certainly do not have to accept every opinion somebody gives us. Some comments are unhelpful or unkind.
But constructive criticism deserves a moment of consideration before we dismiss it.
Sometimes the thing we most want to defend ourselves against is the very thing that gives us an opportunity to make a positive change.
And sometimes the first step towards feeling better is simply to stop, breathe and look at ourselves from another perspective.
Your surroundings can affect how you feel
Our environment can have a real effect on our state of mind.
When we are surrounded by piles of belongings, dirty dishes, laundry, unopened boxes or things we no longer use, it can become overwhelming. Instead of feeling like our home is a place where we can relax, it can become another source of mental pressure.
You do not have to transform your entire home in one day.
Start somewhere small.
Look around and ask yourself, “Have I used this in the last 5 months?”
If the answer is no, ask yourself whether you genuinely need it.
You might discover that you are holding onto things simply because you have become accustomed to seeing them there, or simply living in the excuse that one day I might use it.
And 5 months later, one year later, two years later you still haven’t touched it.
That is called hoarding whether we admit to it or not we’ve all done it.
Clearing even one cupboard, one drawer or one corner of a room can create a sense of achievement. Once you see the difference, you may find yourself motivated to continue.
There is something powerful about physically removing things that you no longer need and creating space around yourself.
Sometimes creating physical space can help us create mental space too.
I have discussed the Wardrobe in a blog about people who are lonely and wonder why they don’t have a relationship titled: ‘How to know if you’re ready for a relationship’
The answer is more simple than they realise, if they open up their wardrobe and realise there is no space in there for anyone to hang their clothes or put any of their belongings. Then it simply means unconsciously we choose not to have a relationship or anyone in our life or are not ready for one.
And what’s more alarming is that some people even have this problem whilst they are in a current relationship, and then wonder why the relationship isn’t working? It’s simply because they are unconsciously pushing their partner out of their life.
It was my Guide Sowella who actually stated that a wardrobe represents the person. Let’s face it, when the wardrobe doors are closed it hides a lot. And that is the same as our bodies. We are often hiding a lot of things going on inside of us where the emotions are concerned they could be a mess, but on the outside we look fine.
Meditation gives you that pause
Meditation does not have to mean sitting cross legged for an hour with your eyes closed.
It can be as simple as sitting somewhere quiet, taking a few slow breaths and allowing yourself to stop reacting for a few minutes.
When something has upset you, give yourself time before responding.
Breathe…. Think….
Ask yourself what you are actually feeling.
Then ask yourself whether your response will improve the situation or make it worse.
That pause can prevent words being spoken in anger that cannot easily be taken back.
It also gives you an opportunity to separate your emotions from the situation itself.
You might realise that you were offended because the comment touched something you already felt insecure about. You might realise that the other person was genuinely trying to help. Or you might decide that their criticism was unfair and that you can calmly disagree.
The important thing is that you are choosing your response rather than allowing the first emotion to choose it for you.
Try looking at yourself from the outside
One of the most useful questions you can ask yourself is:
“What would I tell somebody else if they were in exactly the same situation?”
We can often give other people sensible advice while struggling to give ourselves the same understanding.
Imagine your friend is sitting in a cluttered home, feeling overwhelmed and unhappy. They tell you they cannot seem to get motivated and everything feels like too much.
Would you judge them?
Probably not.
You might say, “Let’s start with one room. Get rid of the things you don’t use. Open the windows. Clean the space. Then see how you feel.”
Sometimes we need to give ourselves that same patience.
Self development is not about becoming a completely different person. It is about becoming more aware of our thoughts, our reactions, our surroundings and the choices we make every day.
Pause before you react.
Question your first assumption.
Listen to constructive advice.
Remove what you no longer need.
Create a calmer environment.
Give yourself time to breathe.
And remember that asking yourself to change something does not mean there is something wrong with you. Sometimes it simply means you are ready to make life feel better.
Today, start with one small thing.
One drawer.
One cupboard.
One room.
One meditation.
One pause before you respond.
Small changes can create momentum, and momentum can change the way you feel about yourself and the life around you.
Your affirmation
Take a deep breath and say this to yourself:
“The clouds are clearing from my mind. I release what no longer serves me. I create space for peace, clarity and positivity. I am ready for what the world brings to me now, under Grace, in a perfect way. I move forward with an open heart, a clear mind and confidence in what lies ahead. I welcome the good that is coming into my life.”
Ready to Clear the Invisible Clutter?
Just like clearing a cupboard or a wardrobe gives you immediate physical relief, clearing your energetic path can lift the heavy mental fog you've been carrying. If you have paused, reflected, and realized you are ready to release patterns that no longer serve you, a personal reading can provide the map you need to move forward with confidence.
At The High Priestess Studio, as a Psychic Medium I aim to help you look at your life from the outside with absolute clarity, deep empathy, and complete transparency.
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Stay blessed in your mind, body and soul🙏🏻
Karen🌹🪽
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