"Losing a loved one is never easy, but not just for you, remember they have some adjustments to make too."~𝒦𝒶𝓇ℯ𝓃🌹
If you're reading this blog, chances are that you have lost someone close to you. A parent, a child or sibling, friend, partner or even a pet. And boy oh boy, sometimes death itself can seem so unfair. But the spirit won't leave the body unless it has to or wants to and nothing that body can do will stop it because often it's because the body has already begun shutting down. And a living soul can't make good with a dying body.
I know all too well that feeling of having to say goodbye one last time, looking into their eyes, holding their hands, trying to encapsulate each second while you can as you take in every line of their face, the shape and colour of their eyes, you find yourself more focused on them than you ever were, because suddenly it hits you, the reality of it all, as you try to strain to listen intentively to every word or watch for one last sign. You now feel that overwhelming pressure within squeezing your heart and throat as you try to be brave enough to say 'it's okay ... you can let go if you want to'.
This is when you know how much you truly love them, because it cuts you up inside to utter the words, but you just know you have to.
I call it the instinct of the soul, because our soul knows that longing to be free, to know that we are loved and cared for by others. You've built a bond that will never break, a invisible link that exists between the realms. Then you feel a sudden shift in the atmosphere around you, their strength is transferred to their soul and they are gone from our world forever.
Before you lays a shell of the person you once shared laughter with, stories that you will carry in your heart forever, if you are blood related that blood will still flow through your heart and body until the end of time. Where their heart stops your new heart starts, it feels heavier than before. You feel a strange sensation through your body, sometimes it's a warmth, sometimes it's a feeling of emptiness, like you're now just a shell yourself of the person you once were.
At that moment you too have changed and you have to accept that this is the end of the days when you could just pick up the phone, drop around or share a laugh together.
You walk away hesitantly, you need to call people, family members who couldn't be there, friends and then everything swirls around you like being caught up in a cyclone of grief and needing to make plans, when you just want to curl up somewhere and hide until this bad dream has ended. But it doesn't, not for now, you have to be strong. You either feel like screaming, crying or both. Suddenly you notice people more, you see reflections of your life flashing through the people and their behaviour, or you suddenly feel like reaching out and saying something to the child that is being rude towards their mother or father to be grateful to have them, or the woman complaining about her partner not taking out the garbage for garbage night, or the man who makes snide remarks about his partners weight, or the person complaining about their kids, even certain jokes you might once have laughed at no longer seem appropriate, ..accept it, you have changed, grown up just that little bit more, a part of you wants to say 'I'd give anything to have them back again'. The words echo and those names seem to have more meaning than ever before.
Yes, death is inevitable and sometimes cruel and we are never truly prepared for it, even if we know the very second it will occur, it's still difficult. But the process of life is not easy no matter how rich or poor you are, grief still takes time to overcome. And all the money in the world won't stop it once it comes. Once thing is for certain, Death has no favourites.
But there is one thing that many people don't know and that's whenever you speak their name you are always heard. You see, the physical body may be no more but the soul is eternal, and as my own parents in the new world assist me in wording this very blog they ask me to share how incredible the process is and how much I and all those yet to experience death are going to feel when that time comes knocking on our doors.
They share how fearful they were initially when they were realising their souls were separating from their physical body, my grandmother just said "I was terrified but excited at the same time." She expressed how she could feel her arms and legs getting cold. How she could feel a pulling sensation tugging on her chest and head, but not a massive pain, but one she described as like being caught up in a rip when the water pull you out to sea, only the sea is more intense and you can't drown but as you stop resisting it feels completely normal and so great you don't even want to breath because you don't feel the need to.
We all knew she longed to leave and mum in spirit was there to help her over. The love that she shared with me as she was leaving will always stay with me, the day my father's spirit first stood by my bed and spoke to me will always stay with me, the day my mother played talk back radio through detached speakers will stay with me. The one thing that you can always be sure of is that they hear you and do visit you.
Even when you don't realise it, they will be there. Sometimes it's in your heart that you will feel them near. That's why you speak to them, because of the soul link you instinctively have. You might find yourself speaking about them, retelling stories of your life experiences or words of wisdom they shared. You might suddenly have an answer to a nagging problem that has kept you from sleeping properly. Some may even swear they heard their name called. Yes, that's them! And in moments like this when the veil is at its thinnest, you can have full on conversations with them. It doesn't make you mad, it makes you spiritual.
Have you ever had a moment where you're busy washing dishes, hanging out washing, driving or laying in bed and suddenly you get a memory that makes you smile, it could be something you remember your loved one saying you did that made them laugh when you were a child, a joke they would tell a zillion times but just the way they would laugh made it all the more funnier even though you knew the punchline, or thoughts that race through your mind linked to the deceased and you just wonder what made you even think about that? Well if you said "they did" you're right!
Many times I have witnessed people who are approached by a spiritual being and then I notice their demeanour changes, they may smile to themselves or just go quiet as if deep in thought. Some even get teary eyed.
I see the spirit often hug them and say the same words "I'm here", or make a comment about something that I notice the person reacts to.
I recall that happening to my aunt one day in her kitchen, she was talking about one thing then I saw my grandmother walking up behind her, give her a hug and whisper something to her then my aunt suddenly stopped what she was doing, turned towards me and said "you know just now, I don't know why, but I saw Nanna's face just smiling".
I found it amazing since my grandmother was behind her not in front of her.
I was a little deflated though because at first when I saw her react to my grandmother I thought OMG she felt her! But after that I noticed other people doing similar behaviour after a spirit approached them. It must say, it is really beautiful to witness.
But they do visit, and they do connect with us in our dreams, when our souls are in the same space and time. If you want a dream visitation I do have some audio recordings to assist with that process on the audio page in particular 'Astral Projection'.
But I will leave you with a message from my loved ones who want you to know that there's one thing that everyone in the new world wants those of us left behind to know, and that is...
"We know it's not easy, but we know that your loved ones and friends will always find a way to watch over you. And let you know that they are there. It's a big world here, even bigger than it was there so sometimes we can take a little longer to give you definitive signs, but here's a tip: Don't look for the obvious signs, if it's one thing we know it's that when you get a sign you will automatically know it."
There are some occasions when I call out to my loved ones and they don't answer me. It's not very common for them to be there every single second. But I have caught their presence in times when I am more rested, I have also had them say "it's about time, we've been trying to get your attention." Then they tell me about a gap in the cat run that needs fixing then in comes on of our cats with blood on it head where he scratched it in the wire as he was trying to get out of the run. Sometimes even as a medium, I can be either too busy or not relaxed enough to hear them especially if I am too tired, then that plays havoc well that is especially when I might have others around, this can sometimes have my loved ones stand back or just say 'I'll come back when you're not so busy.
I recall it took my grandfather 12 years to visit me, then on the same day he visited my other aunt and me a second time. 12 YEARS! 🤦🏼♀️
But please don't worry, they miss you just as much as you miss them, and that's a guarantee! And if they choose not to come through during a reading never take it personally, because they know what is best for you and some just don't want to share private details with a complete stranger, whereas some might share more than you would like them to.
One thing I will never advertise to do is mediumship on its own, no medium should ever advertise to do a service that is solely mediumship because it is not up to the medium nor is it up to the person having the reading it is up to spirit if they wish to come through or not. And they must not be forced, always respect those in the New World. They know what's best.
Just know that many spirits are around their loved ones purely to help them to adjust, and they may be around them for many months before they decide to fully cross over. And while I am on the subject of crossing over one thing any person should not do is offer to help them cross over. Because until we can see where we are sending them we should not be making that offer. For all we know we could be sending them to hell. Would you like that on your conscience? I certainly wouldn't. The only thing that a person can do whether there are medium or not is asked that spirit to call out to their angels and guides they will never leave their side and when they call to them they will show themselves. And no matter who the medium is there is only so much spirit will let us see. But we will not see the new world until we ourselves are in spirit.
In addition to this please be aware that no spirit guide will reveal their name or themselves to anyone except the person they are watching over so if someone tells you your spirit guides name, sex, or anything else about your guides appearance etc, that isn't absolute lie.
But I can tell you this, in the words of my father , when I asked what the new world was like?
He replied with 'Very Happy!'
As you'll hear in this recording below.
And when I asked if anyone on the other side had anything to tell the people left here, he replied with "please don't cry."
My deepest condolences on your loss.
Stay blessed🙏🏼🌹