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Living as a Medium what you didn't know.

One thing is for certain, and that is your loved ones are closer than you realise.

I worked with a woman who I never spoke of the man I saw often around her. It was a job I didn't want anyone to know of my ability to see and hear spirit. There were times I heard the disembodied voices speaking as if in conversation with their loved ones here.

And what I found interesting was how colleagues without realising, were saying almost word for word what spirit was saying. This took me aback a few times because I wondered if they had the same ability. And a few times I was tempted to ask, but it was all that having to explain and then justify myself. Not to mention the fact the minute you are discovered to have this ability out come the trick questions like can you tell me how old I'll be when I marry etc.

In this instance, I actually did divulged to the woman in quiet she had a male fathering spirit with her, I then realised it was out before I could stop myself and then came the questions, what's his name? How did he die? Where was he born? When was he born? How old was he? How old was I? I simply said 'I see him around you but unless he chooses to talk to me I'm afraid I can't tell you' she gave a grimace look as if to say 'lady you're full of it!'

This is one of the frustrating things being me, I don't have all the answers and I don't play guessing games. If spirit don't want to talk to me I can't make or force them.

But I soon had to leave because it was all over the office and peace was not easy to find not to mention the creeped out looks I'd receive, or the mocking like 'seen any ghosts lately?'

I pause whenever I hear someone say 'oh you're so lucky to have that gift' and they wonder why I say hmm as a reply. Sometimes it is wonderful and there are times you have no idea what it entails. Fake friends who only like to talk to you in case they get a reading or a message from a loved one, you suddenly become a target for insult and naive people who accuse you without knowing how you are as a person of preying on the vulnerable.

It isn't all fun and games as people think in fact there are times you need to get a backbone and tell a spirit to leave you alone because you can't help them get justice or bring their body to a eternal resting place. It sometimes affects you more because you are technically stuck between a damned if you do and damned if you don't place. The mood swings occur because psychologically, spirit will cause you to experience their emotions or the death process without the actual death experience. The panic attacks are frequent, lack of sleep is common, and then in a bittersweet way I can say I have more genuine friends on the other side than here on this realm.

I've had occasions where I've burst into tears and the only ones comforting me are 'the spirits'.

It annoys me when I hear that others who say they see and hear them claim they can turn it on and off at will or by wearing a cap tells the spirits they can't talk to them. Sorry but I've done everything even been overly polite and they still come, I guess in all sincerity though because it's been a part of my life for so long I probably wouldn't be able to adjust to not having them around.

So when a person is quick to say gee I wish I had that ability, maybe you'd reconsider if it were so pronounced in your life that you found socialising harder with the physical beings than those who've crossed over that sadly, only you can see.

It may sound like I'm whining but what people don't realise is how real this is, how real they are! And to the skeptics that say it's all crap I ask you how then is it possible to record the spirits voices and their manifestations if they aren't real? Demons! Will be their answer no doubt but to the skeptic I then ask how can you believe in demons if you don't believe in spirit? Are they not still of another realm?

No matter what though, your loved ones do visit like it or lump it grin emoticon I know because I've been told by them, oh yes and don't think they don't know how you think about them, I guess some of the most saddest of visitations are the ones that realise only after they left this realm that they were nasty or just plain mongrels toward their loved ones and yet the only real important thing they crave above all their material possessions they ever put before their family is forgiveness and to hear their loved ones say 'I'm sorry you had to find out what a mess you made of our lives when you were here' because that's what happens, apparently after we die we get that long awaited reality check that should had come whilst we were here but we put materialism and selfishness before the one thing that cannot be bought 'love' and more importantly 'respect'.

If you have a loved one on the other side you're still holding a grudge over, you CAN heal the wounds by simply making the steps to forgive and move forward, wallowing in anger and bitterness only makes you just as bad as they were, the only difference is, you're here still amongst the living and even though they are too only a handful of people will see them.

Change the path today and right the wrongs in your own life for those wrongs your loved ones did. Don't follow in their footsteps but heal them over and learn to live love!

Goodnight and sweet dreams ~ Karen

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